This weekend I am participating in a yoga teacher training retreat focused on gentle & restorative yoga. There are many reasons I was drawn to this offering, but one of the top ones is that, perhaps because I have a tendency towards spaces where people tend to be newer to yoga, I have consistently gotten requests for gentle yoga (in terms of what the people want).

My strategy is to go places where I want to be, and offer to share my gifts there. These tend to be the spaces where they intentionally are inclusive and supportive of people. Think third spaces, grassroots community events, spaces rescuing food and serving warm meals.

Don't get me wrong - I am just getting started, and have a lot I want to birth into this world over time. For now though - I'm thrilled for the educational opportunities I currently have in my life, and am eager to share and integrate these lessons, with awareness that I need to pace myself, so as to not bite off more than I can chew.

OK - Back to the topic at hand. During my class today, we spent some time talking about the nervous system, polyvagal theory, and how it all works. Rest assured, I went through a VERY wide range of emotions today!!! Here are a few key takeaways that I want to share with you, and will immediately fold into my practice:

1) A healthy nervous system is: adaptable (able to form new pathways), flexible (able to meet the need for the moment), and resilient. There is the easy misconception that the goal is a calm nervous system. But that doesn't quite hit the mark... and I now understand the way I've been thinking about that phrasing refers to a desire for a familiar baseline (common way of being) that is in the parasympathetic state (rest/digest/recover), as opposed to a baseline in the sympathetic (fight/flight/freeze/fawn) state.

That's HUGE on its own in terms of proper future messaging and understanding... but now get this:

2) It is possible to form new pathways and patterns... AND that journey starts with non-judgemental acknowledgement of the present experience. Validation that it is happening, and it is temporary. After acknowledgement comes the step of wanting to meet the need. This as opposed to shame, denial, judgement about the experience of feeling pain.

• This is the key to how we don't let pain (which is inevitable in life) turn into suffering (which is unnecessary pain about the pain)
• The pain is the first arrow that struck you... you don't have to hit yourself with a 2nd and 3rd arrow though. The additional arrows being along the lines of denial, shame, guilt about the pain, that just compounds to make it all worse. Credit to Thich Nhat Hanh here for the arrow visual.

AND

Rather than taking a harmful and harsh inner voice and trying to flip it straight to positive... you'd likely go farther aiming for neutral... because the neutral has a better chance of "getting in" (for lack of better words). More balanced or neutral language, like you might use for a loved one or a beloved pet.

This is a lesson in meeting ourselves where we are.

There's this idea that the yoga matt is a laboratory... and whatever happens on your mat most likely happens in your daily life. This means each yoga practice is a chance for us to intentionally begin to integrate things we want more of in ourselves and our daily lives. This is our chance to adapt ourselves to patterns that reduce our own suffering (like more neutral self-talk).

One of my favorite suggestions for a yoga practice intention is Ahimsa, meaning non-violence from the 8 limbs of yoga. That non-violence applies mentally, physically, emotionally to others as well as ourselves.

Just imagine me saying:

"So during this gentle yoga class, I invite you to meet yourself where you are. Typically I might suggest you go to max 80% of your capacity... but today, maybe we are working on ahimsa, and practicing more non-violent self-compassion... Maybe today we only go to 60%... feel into where you reach your soft edge, then hangout, breathe, and figure it out from there."

TLDR:

Here's an invitation to meet yourself where you are. Somehow we are conditioned to unconsciously plow straight through our own needs and boundaries. That needs to stop. Our bodies, and nervous systems carry much wisdom to share with us. By mindfully listening, we unlock the ability to adapt ourselves, and therefore the patterns that create our lives.

Mindfulness = Awareness + Compassion